Why "Friends" Still Matters

It’s been 30 years since Ross, Joey, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler ruled the airwaves. Here’s why they’re still speaking for us even at middle age

I’m old; old enough to remember when the sitcom Friends was still on the air. You could watch it for free, every week, without any streaming service whatsoever! Yeah, those were some wild times, baby.

Although there was a lot about the show I found absurd and unrealistic—how in the hell did they afford those gigantic apartments, much less a fucking pet monkey?—that didn’t stop me from watching it anyway. Sometimes to make fun of it, sure, but there were times I earnestly related to it. I mean, come on, a bunch of aimless 20-somethings, riddled with neurosis, incapable of healthy relationships, who spent most of their free time hanging out in coffee shops, making lame jokes? Could this BE more about me?

I’m in my 50s now, long past the target age for a show like Friends. and yet ever so often, I’ll find myself watching an old rerun again. And it’s not just me: Americans spent 14 billion minutes watching Friends in 2022, and that jumped to 25 billion minutes the following year. That can’t all be new viewers, right? A sizable chunk of that viewing time has got to be old farts like me, revisiting a sitcom from an era before social media or cell phones. You know, back when life was simpler, and the world was stupid for different reasons.

Why do I, a middle-aged adult, still find the show so relatable and charming, even though my life couldn’t be more different? That’s because Friends, despite its youth-centric premise, slots perfectly into midlife. With Friends’ 30th anniversary just around the corner—the very first episode aired on September 22nd all the way back in 1994—I hand-selected a few of my favorite one-liners from Ross, Joey, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler to demonstrate how the magic of Friends transcends age.

“How you doin'?”—Joey

Original meaning: I’d like to take you to Central Perk… and then immediately back to my apartment.

Current meaning: I would like an update on your kid's foul moods and your plantar fasciitis diagnosis.

“I wish I could, but I don’t want to.”—Phoebe

Original meaning: I decline to help my friends assemble new furniture.

Current meaning: The rock concert starts at 9pm? Um… hard pass.

“When I first meet somebody it’s usually panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.”—Chandler

Original meaning: I have crippling social anxiety.

Current meaning: I have some troubling symptoms that I should probably bring up with my doctor.

“That’s not even a word!”—Monica

Original meaning: My teammate incorrectly guessed “transponster” during a fiercely competitive trivia contest.

Current meaning: My teen just said “bussin’” and I’ve never been more confused.

“Pivot! Pivot!”—Ross

Original meaning: We’ll get this couch up the narrow apartment stairwell if you just follow my instructions.

Current meaning: I thought this pilates class would be fun, but my 50-year-old spine begs to differ.

“Could I be wearing any more clothes?”—Joey

Original meaning: My friend has hidden all my underwear, so I’ve found a creative way to get revenge.

Current meaning: I’m aware that it’s 50 degrees outside, but I’m freakin’ cold. 

“No uterus, no opinion.”—Rachel

Original meaning: My friend’s well-meaning concern about my pregnancy is cute but unnecessary.

Current meaning: I appreciate your opinions on reproductive rights, but maybe we don’t discuss politics over dinner.

“Dear God, this parachute is a knapsack!”—Chandler

Original meaning: I tried to comfort my friend but instead I insulted her, and now I keep making things worse.

Current meaning: I just got a look at my 401(k) balance, and I’m not going to be retiring anytime soon.

“We were on a break!”—Ross

Original meaning: During a separation, I should be able to see other people.

Current meaning: I didn’t mean I was giving up fried food forever. Just long enough so my doctor stops scolding me about my cholesterol.

“My eyes!! My eyes!!”—Phoebe

Original meaning: I accidentally saw two of my friends hooking up.

Current meaning: I accidentally stumbled on my angry uncle’s Facebook page.

“And I have to live with a boy! (bursts into tears)”—Monica

Original meaning: I am having complicated emotions about moving in with my boyfriend.

Current meaning: I am having complicated emotions about my adult son moving back home.

“I’m gonna get all uncomfortable and probably make some stupid joke.”—Chandler

Original meaning: My friend is moving to Paris, and I’m having a hard time saying goodbye.

Current meaning: I’m meeting my kid’s boy/girlfriend for the first time, and somehow I’m more nervous than they are.

“Who is FICA? Why’s he getting all my money?”—Rachel

Original meaning: I just got my first paycheck and learned about payroll tax deductions.

Current meaning: I’ve been employed since before Friends started airing, but payroll deductions still irk me.